Housework

31 March 2011 - Norwich


Today, I have housework on my mind. I hate housework - except when I'm really on a mission to get it done. I would rather have six major blasts of it a year than the relentless weekly chore which I put off and put off until I can do so no longer. Unfortunately, I have the hairiest dog in the world and, if I hoovered six times a day, I would never get rid of all the fur. I'm basically lazy and would rather sit on my sofa with the dog, a gardening magazine and a family size pack of Maltesers.


So I have devised strategies to make sure that I do tidy up and clean - I cook for friends. I have a regular stream of guinea pigs through my house trying out my new recipes and it is this that makes me clean the house. But not always.


This weekend is different - my on/off/on at the moment partner is coming to stay for the weekend. Now, he is very cleanliness conscious, although, at the same time, the most untidy person ever. He leaves a wake of dirty clothing, empty glasses, newspaper, etc, wherever he goes and I end up walking behind in his slipstream, disposing of the rubbish and putting the dirty crockery in the sink for washing up. Another job I hate. Although I find it more bearable in the spring/summer when I can gaze out of the kitchen window onto my garden. Perhaps I should invest in some sort of trompe-l'oeil blind for the months when there is nothing to gaze at outside? (Trompe-l'oeil is a concept I have learned about from one of my housey magazines, which come second only to gardening magazines for favoured reading. Fashion magazines do not even appear on the list.)


So tonight, when I return from work, there will be a flurry of activity in my house as I attempt to make things beautiful and sparkling and shiny, ready for the man's arrival tomorrow. I already know I'm doomed to fail. Every week I religiously make a list of everything to do during the week - it is the same list recycled every Saturday - and there are maybe twenty chores to be carried out and crossed off the list with a flourish. I don't recall a week where I have ever accomplished everything on the list. I don't suppose I ever will.

Rain

30 March 2011 - Norwich I'm not sure where this blog is going to take me - or even why I'm writing it. I guess I've always wanted to write but never really had the balls to do so. Yesterday, however, I read something very sad - someone I had admired and envied had taken her own life following a bout of severe depression. I didn't know her personally, but had read a lot of her work - she was passionate about her gardening, her environment, her dog, her friends, her community. I imagine I felt some empathy with her and recognised her life as being mine too. Although that may be just a symptom of growing up and turning into your mother, something we all fight so hard against but which becomes, inevitably, our lot.

I also have suffered from depression and am, thankfully, a long way from that at the moment, and I wanted to list the things I love now, just in case I end up in the depths of despair again and need a reminder of how wonderful things can be. This list is not exhaustive and, indeed, some of the things that are on it today could be on my "hate" list tomorrow. Similarly, things I barely tolerate today could be my "next big thing". So, in no particular order, my current loves are my dog; being outdoors; my job; gardening; walking; food; cooking for friends and family; flowers; driving; rain; seasons; primroses; my house.

The things I hate are injustice, unfairness, my constant guilt at over-eating and under-exercising, especially when Finn, my dog, misses out on a walk. However, I'm also cognisant that, if, for any reason, I don't take him out for a constitutional, the sky is not going to fall in. I've learned to be less hard on myself as I get older. I leave that to others.

So, how do I write this? Will it just be ramblings about what's happened during the day? Or will it be more profound than that? I guess it will be about the most important thing on my mind - today it's rain. I have spent the past two days planting a multitude of shrubs and seeds in my little garden and had almost exhausted the water supply in the well, so am very pleased to see it's rained all day and replenished the supply. I would, however, have been none too chuffed if I'd been working in the garden today. Susan x